I love my girlfriend very much and I don’t want to lose her so I have brought the issue here to see if I can find some solution to her problem. She has a very serious issue of stealing and it’s so bad that sometimes I have to check her myself or else she will disgrace herself. When we started dating, she will visit me and I will notice that money has gone missing in my wallet. I didn’t want to suspect her. The relationship was still new and I couldn’t believe that a nice girl like this will be stealing money everytime she visits, so I set a trap for her. I left some money on my table and lo and behold it vanished the moment she came to visit and left. The strange thing too is that I don’t leave the room but she is so fast that she can steal from you when your attention is on something else. I spoke to her about setting the trap for her and that’s how she opened up to me and started crying.
My girlfriend used to steal from her own parents and siblings. She said her mother has beaten her over it many times but nothing has changed. She has been disgraced at school, but the same issue remains. Her elderly sister gave birth and she was going to her place to help her. Can you people believe that my girlfriend stole her sister’s husband’s phone? That day she wasn’t lucky. The man started complaining that he couldn’t find his phone. My girlfriend too had not left the house and her sister knew that she is a thief. They searched her bag and found the phone and they have warned her never to visit them again. I haven’t told anyone about this problem of hers. I have contemplated leaving her many times to be very frank with you all. But I can see that this is a genuine problem she has and I want to help her.
We have dated for three years now and I can tell when she is lying to me. Recently, I celebrated my birthday and she bought me some nice boxer shorts. Six of them. I don’t know why, but something told me she stole the boxers. Here’s the thing. I basically take care of her. She is not working or doing anything to fetch some money and the brand of boxers she bought were those foreign expensive briefs. I sat her down and asked her to tell me the truth. At first she got defensive and said I don’t trust her anymore. But I patiently told her I won’t get angry if she told me the truth and that I understand that she wanted to buy something for me for once to make me happy. That’s when she told me she stole the boxers from a shop in town. She didn’t have to. I was planning for us to go out to celebrate my day. I told her, yet she did that.
She has done a lot of similar things like that and I feel like my patience with her is running out. On one hand, I love her a lot. I have plans for her. I’m saving to rent a shop for her to establish her a little. But with this problem, I’m sure she’ll steal her own profits and the things in the shop and it will collpase. Her family doesn’t want to have anything to do with her. She has brought disgrace to them. Everyone in her area knows she is a thief so she has left there and now stays with me. If after three years of dating her and trying to change her, she hasn’t changed, then I don’t know what to do again. These day, when I talk to her about the problem, she just breaks down in tears and I have to stop it because I don’t like to see her cry.
I don’t know if this is a spiritual problem. I really fear for her. What if she goes out and steals one day and gets caught? She could be beaten or burnt or even go to jail. I have told her several times that if the police is to catch her, her family will not come to her rescue. I am all she has but she won’t listen. I didn’t like the fact that she stole the boxers so I haven’t even worn them. I can’t return them too because it will look suspicious. I want a final solution to this. If by the end of this year, she doesn’t make any effort to change, I will have to let her go. I don’t want to enter the New Year with all of her issues. Because of her, I’m not even concentrating on my life and the plans I have for myself. It’s always her. Please I need a permanent solution to her stealing problem. If not, I’ll have to break up with her even though I love her.