THE OLDER MAN WHO HAS ALWAYS BEEN THERE

I am 18 years and he is 39 years. He has always known me since I was a child. I stay in the same house with my parents and my father’s brother. The 39-year-old man is my uncle’s close friend and he used to come to our house to visit my uncle and watch football together. As a child, he always jokingly called me his wife and I was always shy of him. He would buy sweets when he came to visit and will carry me and make me sit on his lap. I was a child. My parents or uncle saw nothing wrong with that so I didn’t know it was even wrong.

 

When I became a teenager, I realized he always had his eyes on me when he visited. He would make funny jokes about how my backside and front have started to develop. He would say that he likes how my melons (referring to my breast) look in a particular dress I was wearing. He usually said these things when my parents were not around. But I ignored him. When I was 14 years, he asked me if I had a boyfriend. I shyly told him no and he asked if I would like him to be my boyfriend. I just laughed. He said he wasn’t that older than me and I was a very beautiful girl so he didn’t want anyone else to take away his ‘wife’ from him.

 

He was still calling me his wife when I turned 18 and got admission to University. He started visiting me on campus without the knowledge of my parents or Uncle. He would drive and wait for me in front of my hostel. Somehow, I realized that he has always been serious about me. Since my childhood. He has always liked me and he was never joking at all. He has bought some very expensive things for me. My parents don’t know that he sends me money weekly and because of that I am able to take care of myself in school. He has bought a laptop and phone for me. I don’t know if the feelings I have started developing for him is love or affection. As a child, when I looked at him, I saw a father figure or someone I could call an uncle or elder brother. Now that I am an adult, he wants me to be more than that. He wants me to be his girlfriend and right now he is forcing me to make it official.

He said he has waited for me to grow to become an adult before making it official and he even jokingly said that he will kill himself or harm my parents if I don’t marry him. I asked him why he would say that and he said he was just kidding but that he wants me to accept him. The age difference between us is 21 years. I don’t know if I will be doing anything wrong if I give him a chance because I think I have started developing feelings for him. He also takes very good care of me. He sends me money before I ask him for anything. I told him I will like to talk to my parents and Uncle before accepting him. He got angry and told me they will not accept it because of the age difference. He has told me to remember all the gifts he has bought me since my childhood. Sometimes I am afraid he is manipulating me. Other times I think I am in love with him. What should I do?