I work in a club, I’ve been working there for the past 4 years and I’m used to men making advances at me and trying to get me in their bed and all of that. There was this guy who was coming almost every week. On a normal day, I wouldn’t be able to remember the customers because they’re so many and I see a lot of faces every evening. But he used to frequent the place so much that I noticed him. What even made me notice him more was a time he got so drunk that my colleague waitress and I had to get a car for him home because he came alone. He came back the following day to thank me. We became friends from that day and it has been like that ever since. I’m a Nigerian girl, and I came to Ghana about 10 years ago with my mother. Unfortunately, she passed away just two years after we got here and I have been on my own since then.
When I became friends with this guy that was coming to the club, I felt seen. It was like for the first time since I started working there, someone was chatting with me like a normal friend will chat you, so we got very close as a result. One time I went to visit him and we had s*x. It became a normal thing for us. But it wasn’t as if we were dating. We didn’t put a name on it until he once called me his friend with benefits and I accepted it that way. We continued that way for a while and then one time he told me about his friends. He said they wanted to have fun with me like in a threesome. I wasn’t really comfortable with it, but they were offering me money to do it and I didn’t see what the big deal was so I agreed to it.
It happened one Saturday night. I called my boss and told him I was sick and I couldn’t come to work. My friend took me to one house and both of his friends were already waiting. We started watching some movies and then they all took turns with me and gave me money. This too became normal, but because of how my work was, we were meeting more in the daytime at the same house for it. Sometimes one of the three friends will call me and tell me he was in the mood and I should pass by for a quickie. Sometimes it was two out of the three friends. They were paying me through all of these acts and that additional money was helpful to me because my pay wasn’t enough. I think this continued for about a year.
Then suddenly I will be there and an unknown number will call me telling me to come over for ‘short’. Then another number will call asking for my prices or other times people will WhatsApp me telling me to do a live video session for them to pay me. That’s when I realised that these three friends had given my number out to many guys. They were telling everyone I was a hookup girl. I felt so stupid and used. I was okay with having one guy as a friend with benefits. Then he introduced two friends, but that was my limit because he even suggested they add a fourth guy but I told him if he adds another friend I won’t do it again because I didn’t want to add more people. Three was my limit.
I changed my number and stopped talking to them. But they have been dming me on social media. Strange guys wanting to have s*x with me. Then these three friends started coming to the club with other guys and telling the guys I’m a hookup girl. I told my boss they were harassing me and he said it’s all part of the job we’re doing and I should be nice to the customers. I wish I never did a threesome with them. I wish I was never his friend with benefits and I don’t know how to move on from all of this.