My boss and I have been having an affair for almost two years. I am his personal assistant and he shares very personal issues with me. He told me about his marital problems and how disrespectful his children are becoming. He told me about his wife’s spending habits and how greatly it is affecting his finances. I feel like I know him more than his wife. He has even shared some of his passwords with me. This is how much he trusts me. For the past eight years of working as her PA and almost two years of being her girlfriend, I haven’t disappointed him and I don’t intend to.
I am married myself. Five years in. We are okay. I wouldn’t say we are living a fairy tale happily ever after marriage. We try to make time for each other. We try to be there for our daughter, and so far so good. I just feel like there is no real spark anymore. My marriage feels forced. Almost like we are working excessively hard to keep ourselves together. With my boss, it feels so easy. We don’t force conversations or try too hard. We just flow. My boss is more romantic and funny than my husband. He knows how to hold and keep conversations. He knows how to handle my mood swings and calm me down when I am overwhelmed. He has told me I complement him in ways his wife doesn’t. I wish I could say that having a relationship outside my marriage makes me feel guilty. But I don’t feel bad at all. I feel like my boss is more like my husband than my actual husband.
The issue is, I had no idea the two men knew each other. I had no idea my boss and husband had been mates in school. Not just mates actually. They were good friends. Even to the point where my husband had to perch with my boss for a while when he didn’t get a room to sleep in when they were in Uni. This came to light when my boss organized a little Easter party on Good Friday. I didn’t want to go with my husband. I didn’t want my husband to meet my lover even if he wasn’t aware I was having an affair. But he was so insistent. Our daughter was spending her vacation with her grandparents. I had to give in. My husband and my boss were so excited to see each other after all these years and I felt very awkward in the middle of all of it.
They were chatting away the whole night. My boss’ wife was not around. She didn’t like the idea of an Easter party for her husband’s workers so she was absent. I did not like the idea that these two men knew each other at all. I was uncomfortable the whole time and I couldn’t wait to leave the place. The worse part is that my boss called me later and told me it was over between us. According to him, my husband is a good friend to his and he did not want to hurt him. In addition to that he is transferring me to another branch of the company. I cried very hard that day. He cannot do this to me. Not after all we have been through together. Not after what we have shared together. I have been so vulnerable to him. He just used me and dumped me and he is claiming his friendship with my husband is the reason. Does this even make sense?
I will not accept this transfer. If he forces my hand, I will go straight to his wife and show him our chats. I don’t care if I destroy my marriage in the process. But I will never let this man do this to me. I love him!