Hello. Please I want to know if there is something I can do to cleanse myself of what I’ve done and free myself. I’m a 18 year old girl. My boyfriend is 19 years. We attend the same school and we’re in the same class. It’s an international school, and we use the British curriculum. He is not Ghanaian, but I am. Our parents are joint partners in a business venture and they’re close as a result. That’s how we started seeing each other 2 years ago. I’m a Christian, his family is agnostic, and he has the freedom to believe anything he chooses. I started trying to influence him and bring him to church with me somewhere last year and we started going together. Our parents travel a lot and it’s usually my big brother who takes care of me when they’re not around. He still has a caretaker though.
He’s very adventurous and carefree. That’s what I like about him. I’m more layed back and reserved. We have been sneaking around the church and doing some very crazy stuff. So far, we have been intimate in the washroom three times. We tried one of the church’s smaller auditoriums one evening after service but we stopped because we heard footsteps approaching. My boyfriend gets excited about doing these things with me. He says doing it in our rooms all this while is getting boring and he enjoys the new adventure. I feel very unclean and sinful everytime we do it in church and I have told him. He is a baby christian. I led him to say the sinners prayer although his parents don’t know. These things don’t affect him like they affect me. I tried opening up to my school psychologist and she has told me I shouldn’t make him force me do to anything I’m not comfortable with, but if it’s with my consent, I should just make sure he uses protection. That’s something we both don’t compromise on.
My parents know we get intimate and my mother has advised me to always use protection. But apart from that, we don’t discuss these things. It’s very weird. My boyfriend tells me I feel unclean because of the stuff the pastor talks about. He tells me a lot of things that plant doubts in me about Christianity and I don’t know what to believe anymore. My brother barely attends church anymore. Except for some major events like Crossover. Admin, I want to know if there are some open-minded people on your page who will access this for me without any judgements. Why do I feel very bad after we get intimate? Is it spiritual or is it just my subconscious mind reminding me of all the teachings of our pastor? Can I do anything apart from asking God for forgiveness to cleanse myself? My boyfriend and I both disagree on this subject and he knows I’ll be sharing this. We’ll both be reading comments. Thanks for creating this platform.