My wife and I are both in our 40s. We have been married for 18 years now with 4 children. I hope that your readers don’t judge me based on the things I’ve done but rather help me to find a solution to the problem I’m facing. This problem is the reason I have written to you so that you share it for them to see. So I find it very difficult to stay with one woman. It didn’t start today. I became sexually active at around 14 or 15 years. Since then, I cannot maintain a committment to one person. I have tried my best but it has never worked. Many of my exes would catch me cheating and then leave me because of that. After many years of living like this, I got very careful and made sure that none of my girlfriends ever caught me cheating again.


I even go as far as memorising the phone numbers of other ladies I’m cheating with so that I don’t save it at all. I used to save the numbers using different names. Even male names but because of some things that happened, I decided it was the best to not save the number at all. I wish I can go into that story but it will take too much time and it’s not the reason I wrote this. My wife and I dated for 3 years. It was the longest relationship I’ve ever had so i decided to marry her. I tried my best not to cheat. Like very hard but it wasn’t easy and just a few months after our wedding, I met a lady and it has been one woman from another. My wife is the reserved type. I used to think she doesn’t have any hint that I have been cheating all these years, but recently, I saw the contact of my current girl on her phone. It was saved with the girl’s name. They have also been calling each other and talking for hours. The information is on my wife’s phone.


The girl in question is a 23 year old university student I am seeing on the side and it has been almost a year since I saw her. As far as I know, she doesn’t know I am married and she doesn’t know my wife. I haven’t even saved her number on my phone. I have it in memory and our whatsapp chats delete automatically. I wanted to ask her if she knew any person by the name (my wife’s name) but I don’t want to create any problems. If I ask my wife too it may lead me into trouble. I thought of using a different number to call the girl and ask if she knows ‘osimasi’ that’s my wife, but the whole situation is dicey and any step I take can expose me to either my wife or my girl. I like both of them. My wife is the mother of my children and she takes care of our home and warms the bed.

I’m nearing 50 in 4 years and this girl makes me feel like a young man again. I have a lot of problems but when I’m in her arms I forget everything and just enjoy her. I need something to do to get out of this without hurting any of the two women. It could also be that my wife knows the girl and it is just a coincidence but I have been careful to make sure that my wife has never known any of my mistresses. So even if it’s just a coincidence that they know each other, I don’t feel safe at all. Do your readers think I should just ask my wife who she is in a normal conversation? What if she already knows and she has been discussing with the girl to destroy me? Knowing how quiet my wife is, she can make plans on her own and hide it from me. Please let your readers help me in making a decision. You can also reply this by telling me what you think. Thank you.